Sunday, February 16, 2014

Perspective Can Be A Wonderful Thing


I'm sitting here in my recliner; not enjoying the head cold that my husband has passed on to me.   The kids don't mind the sick mommy because this translates into extra xbox time for them.  I would feel guiltier about my vegging plan if not for the fact that they love playing Minecraft and we spent time outside, yesterday, playing with water guns and getting way too wet. 






So, as I sit here, hoping that my medicine will work wonders, I'm thinking about my resolution to not raise my voice at my children.  It seems fitting since I don't have the strength to yell right now, anyway.  Anyway, I'd like to think that my patience level has improved. 

Once I realized that my frustration stemmed directly from the lack of organization in the house; I wanted to fix it!  I abandoned the treasure box idea that involved the kids constantly asking if they could get a treat from the treasure box and me sometimes having some available.  And, came up with some standard household rules.   I became obsessed with calling family meetings and making plans for a better, happier household. 

I typed up household rules and taped them to the walls.  I explained that they would go to bed 2 minutes early every time they left a plate/cup/etc in the living room.  They were really, really bad about this, by the way.  I explained what my expectations were in all areas and explained that they  would earn their allowance by following these rules.  I was so inspired!





It mostly worked.

Then, I did more research and taped more signs up!




Nothing worked quite as well as I wanted.  But, we were definitely making progress. :)

Then, one night, when I was feeling frustrated with Lizzie and Antwan.  When I wanted to abandon all my goals and plans and turn into a raging lunatic.  When I wanted to pretend like that would actually solve anything.  That one night, my teenager gave me perspective.

As I sat there, feeling frustrated by the state of affairs and that the house was a mess and that they weren't settling down and going to bed; Kaleb said this to me.

"The way I see it, Mommy; at least I'm not watching anyone get shot."

(This is the part where I explain that Kaleb did see this in his biological home and, at the time, the victim tried to convince him that it was just kool-aid.  No kid should ever have to see that.) 


I mulled on that for a few days.  Even though, I was aware, immediately, that it was a sad and big statement.  It took a few days for it to really sink in, for some reason.  And, this is what I realized when it did.  I realized that, yes, I really, really want a more organized house and I want more organized kids.  But, more than that, I want happy kids and, thankfully, I think I do. 

Yay for matching!


Proud of his headphones!


Showing off their cool pants!


If that means that I have to let some of the small stuff go to keep them that way, so be it. 


But, I worked too hard to type up my fancy rules, so they are totally staying! :)















 
 

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